Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
