THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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