I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
