the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
