i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
