i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
