Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I don't think brook has ever known best
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
