be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
