is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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