Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
