she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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