During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I understand Curling. That high.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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