I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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