i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
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