I want to walk on stilts...naked
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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