i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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