ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
