thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
