I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
FUCK WHALES
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
