No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
