If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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