ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Terrible idea I love it
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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