I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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