nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I need a beard to bite.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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