How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
