Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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