she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
