im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize
