apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
