hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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