next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize