i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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