I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
