My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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