when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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