I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
