only if we run a train.
done.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize