His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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