FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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