I hope mine doesn't look like that
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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