I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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