love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
