But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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