Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
P.S. I can't hear my feet
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
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