Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
