How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
handjob tips. give me some.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
