Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize