i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
