Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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