She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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